Sundowner Rock Crawler Posts: 5,385 Joined: Sep 23, 2013 Logged Admin Neutral Evil AN EXERCISE IN BLATANT LYING CREATIVITY.Due to extensive forum upgrayedding last month we had to skip out on our usual giveaway...but we're back this month, albeit slightly late! In exchange for being late, we're going to give away what you see in the following picture!Pictured: That's right, kids...the Department of Happiness has repossessed Beasley's LJ!Actually, that's a lie: we decided that we really just couldn't give away Beasley's LJ after he managed to freezerbeete the paint off of his rear diff cover when last he went wheeling. Believe it or not, we're actually giving away something that's not nearly as beete-up as the LJ...Pictured: ...and that "something" is a METALLIC SMURF BLUE FOUR-DOOR JK!Please tell us that you didn't fall for that. I mean, seriously, it's well-known that we at the Department of Happiness have exactly one use for a JKU, and that one use is officially termed "Trebuchet Target" in the Department of Happiness' Manual of Questionable Conduct...and since we're not giving away a trebuchet - ...yet... - we don't have any reason to give away a JKU. In actuality, the prize is far more useful than a JKU.Pictured: It's an elementary school license plate AND a Jeep-shaped minivan! Now you can haul your kids in style! Huzzah!Fun Fact: Rule 5,238 in the Department of Happiness' Manual of Questionable Conduct states that "Jeeps should not be painted in any shade of semi-metallic burgundy due to said color being best displayed on a late-model Cadillac Brougham and thus becoming accordingly inferior when applied to any other automotive surface." However, the first person that sends $5 to the Department of Happiness Charitable Fund for The Propagation of Widows and Orphans (c/o Dave P. Bonzo) will get that license plate. Also, speaking of orphans, I'm reminded of the actual giveaway:Pictured: An orphaned baby monkey! Fire up your ovens, boys and girls, because IT COULD BE YOURS! As if! Like we'd give away a stuffed monkey! I mean, for realsies...any monkey we give away will be exceptionally pre-killed. The real giveaway, however, is even better:Pictured: Another slick and unique old-school creation. I honestly didn't think that we'd get to give away another knife and/or handmade creation so soon...but I've been wrong* in the past and will probably be wrong again at least once or twice in the future. However, this time I don't have to be insanely jealous of whomsoever wins the prize, because after the last giveaway I bought an Oldschool of my very own...and I can tell you from firsthand experience that these knives are very good. They balance well, they feel awesome in the hands thanks to their organic and flowing handle shapes, they're solidly build and they're as sharp as flaked obsidian. Even better, they sharpen well and easily and they hold their edges for a long time. Care is simple: touch up the edge and keep a bit of oil on the blade and it'll be in fighting trim for years to come...and if I had any sort of in-focus close-up pictures (and I'm not going to blame anyone for the lack of those pictures, but IT'S BEASLEY'S FAULT) I'd post one so that everyone can see how nice these blades look; the patina on every one is both unique and beautiful. Whomsoever gets this one will appreciate it. So...how does one enter this time around? Good question! Since this is a rather unique and creative knife, we're going to make people be a tiny bit creative in order to enter: TELL US ABOUT YOUR NEXT UPCOMING WHEELING/CAMPING/EXPLORING/OVERLANDING/JEEP-WRECKING ADVENTURE. No points will be awarded for creative writing, but you just might talk a few people into joining you...and if you're the lucky winner of this knife you'll get to gloat about having something awesome that they don't have (and that's always fun).Since we're posting this a day or two late (again, no names, but IT'S BEASLEY'S FAULT) we're going to start accepting valid entries as soon as I click "Post" and quit accepting them...oh, let's give it until 8:00 on August 1st. I'll draw a winner one hour later! Best of luck to those that enter, and many thanks to the man that provided the prize! * - R2 has been known to make mistakes...from time to time.